I'm sitting here, on my comfy sofa :) thinking away... what is a blog? but a collection of thoughts and ideas rounded up.

And I'm thinking to myself.... Am I boring?
Only as boring as I find myself... what do I mean? Well, if I find myself boring, there's not much for people to look forward to and in the end will find me boring as well. I'm only as boring or as interesting as I make myself out to be. Not in the sense that I'm going to outdo myself to not be boring but more in the sense that I just won't think of myself as boring.

I guess for the longest time in my life, I never really thought about it. So it left the possibility out there. I had never thought of myself as "cool" or "boring" or whatever. I was just me. Plain old me. I guess in a sense that's one take of "boringness" but "boring" as a descriptive term, I had never thought of. Then I went back to college, started hanging with a different group of people and for the first time in my life... people started telling me I was cool. It was really weird (kinda still is). I had never been one of the "cool" people, those you look up to and want to be around. Yet, all of a sudden I was one of them.

It truly took me aback. What was I doing that was getting people to like me and want to be around me... or well rather, think of me as "cool"? Nothing. I was acting the same as always, just being me.

Though I'll never understand what made that group of people find me cool, it seems to have spread some. In the sense that it wasn't just them anymore. I joined a social networking site, met people from all over and they found me cool as well. Maybe it's the younger age group, maybe they use the term more loosely now-a-days. Maybe it no longer has the same meaning that it did back in my day (lol yeah, that makes me feel old lol). Whichever it is, it's all good I guess. This is in no way being said in a boasting manner, just to let you in on how my perception is...
And from all this "cool" talk, like people literally telling me that I'm cool maybe it's from there that it stems my thinking of myself as boring. LOL Go figure! From people giving me compliments to others not particularly stating that I'm cool.. is it from there that I take myself to be boring? lol who knows. *shrugs*

On such days as this one, where I'm just sitting around not really doing anything, things don't really tend to stick out much, so off the bat I think "oh I have no life" or "I have no friends" or "I never do anything" and where that last one might be kinda close to home, it's the times when I actually do go out that after the fact it's like I'm hit with the realization that "hey! I friends, what the hell?" and "I do go out!" though not often, but I do :) and "yes, I do have a life!"

So with all of this I was thinking of my website which needs to be moved so I can have more space and my blog which doesn't real "go" anywhere from lack of posts 'cuz I don't really remember to write on it. And the lack of comment postings is kinda sucky as well. I was thinking back some, to other blogs I've had in the past which were fruitful but are now extinct due to the provider closing shop. And if those blog entries attracted people even thought they were just a gathering of my daily activities, why oh why couldn't I do the same now?
Also, reading back what I just wrote, I figure I'll add it here.. for many years people have told me I was weird. And I've accepted this as true, it's one of the things I take pride in. That is, my "weirdness" ^_^ Hell, my nickname's been "Creature" since 1992 and I'm proud of that! So, I'm thinking this "coolness" people see in me, could it be that "weird" is the new "cool". I guess to some extent, that's probably it. Though some weird will always remain weird.
And I'm happy for that! I like being unique :)



Umm... so with that out of the way, I was thinking of what I could possibly write about. My day to day life at work? LOL I think not, that would be boring. Don't get me wrong, I love my job. But it'd become redundant all too fast. I may at some point list a "best of" in regards to it, keeping it short and sweet but that's for another day and time.
I was thinking I could talk about my outings. Although few, they are usually very enjoyable. With the summer being here I feel like spending so much time outdoors but kinda lack that kick in the arse *_* and then I thought to myself, on most days off... what am I doing? I'm online. Well, what do I do online? Many things, and in all the things I do, some things are worth a mention. It's those things I think I'll
write most about. For a matter of reasons, it's good to keep a log if you will, of things you do, kinda to reminisce later on. Keep those memories fresh. Some things may be more just for my personal enjoyment but also for you, who happens to stumble across my blog and who knows, might get a kick out of what you read/see.

So that's that for my little blurb, if you will :)
I'm going to keep it to one "event" per post, 'cuz let's face it. I ramble. LOL

Until next time my fine feathered friend!
This bug is off to eat lettuce ^_^

bloo skies smiling at mee nothing bloo do i see X3

Annyong Aseo!

Another beautiful day is upon us X3

I don't think I've ever cleaned so fast before lol when I got home after my shift yesterday morning I had to clean all that wasn't cleaned as of yet; I had been feeling overly tired and lazy this past while so my condo was looking rather sketchy lol I got everything looking good, was able to shower, dress and even go online for a tad while I kind of watched the game. I must have slept for about 1hr when I got the call.. so not enough sleep, still tho it was some better than none :)

The call was from Kristin. She and Nim have come to spend the long weekend in Montreal (they're from Toronto) took them longer to get here 'cuz they got lost along the way lol they went too far and ended up in the East end hahaha

We started by going to China town. We ate at Deer Garden, very nummy restaurant. Nope, no deer in their garden :( unless it was hiding lol Then we went off to get some bubble tea, then dragon beard. Oh! it had been too long since I've had some *drools* We walked some more, taking in the pretty view, we made our way to the old port. There we introduced Nim to beaver tails nom nom nom lol I had him going for a while, told him they were real beaver tails, they cut them off but not to worry, they grow back in a day or two. As I was munching away on a tail (cinnamon & brown sugar nom nom nom), he asked me if it was a real tail LOL when I said no, he was relieved and took a piece. That was too funny lol

We then walked around some more, window shopping. Then into an art store, of which I can't remember the name nor where exactly it's situated but I'm sure I could find it again (eventually); they had many paintings from different artists. It was kinda like a showcase of what is to come. Once a week, over the course of the year, the room is rented out to one of those artists and during that whole week they display their art pieces. The lady working there told us the schedule was accessible online.. I really should've taken a card.. maybe Kristin will remember what it was called. We walked around some more, then back to the car and finally home around 11:30pm. I was one pooped out bug *nods*

My legs were in pain, my ankle throbbing. I changed, then went online (on PRA)* a tad as an addiction must be fed :) I'm not complaining, I'd do it all over again! I had loads of fun and it'd been a long time since I walked so much. It was quite refreshing ^_^
Sleep finally got the better of me and I feel asleep on cam :)

Today was to be another eventful day. Woke up fairly early (like 7something O.o) then I stayed home as Kristin and Nim were off to church and then off to Mont-Royal. Church isn't my thing, so I stayed home and now I'm feeling too pooped to go walking again although going to the mountain would be awersome on a day like today.. beaver lake must be really pretty, I think however, I'll go to a park nearby. Maybe catch a few more z's before I go. I still feel uber drained it's not funny, but it'd be a shame to not take advantage of a pretty day like today X3

Well, I'm off to see the wonders this world has to offer :)
bai for now X3
*waves*




*PRA stands for Project Revelasian www.projectrevelasian.com
It started as an online community for non-asian girls who like asian guys and vice versa, but they welcome anyone who is interested in asian culture ^_^
It's a very fun and friendly atmosphere. Still a fairly new site, but in development to improve every day. There are forums, groups, polls, blogs as well and of course video chat X3
You need to register to log-in, but registration is free so if you have some spare time, give it a go :)

Oh me, oh my!

I'm watching the Habs vs Flyers game... Oh the shame! 3rd period and we're losing 3-0 with less than 2mins left... We really need to give them energy boosts or something! 30seconds... Woe is me! 15sec.... buzzer.. we've lost T_T seriously, they better pick up their game, it'd be awersome if they could win the cup (ya ya wishful thinking, but it's been waaay too long!)

Well, that's done.. what to do? what to do? I'm home right now, didn't go to work as I'm feeling *blaah* can't go to sleep to early for fear that I won't be able to sleep in late tomorrow. I work night shifts so I can't get up early unless I want to be zombyfied at work *nods*

oh maybe I'll watch Samurai High School.. it looks fun :)

toodles

so long little one, so long..

I have some things I'm firm upon but then for most other things, I'm so easily swayed.

When did it all begin? When did I start to not finish my tasks at hand? I'm the type of person who doesn't feel satisfied 'till I'm fully done what I'm doing. I'm the type who needs to get things done in completion. So, when did I start to lag? When did I start to drop projects half-way???

The problem is, this isn't something recent.. it's been going on for a few years now. I've noticed it before but never really thought about it until today.

Where did it all begin? At first I thought it was during my Aikido course.. but it's further than that. Can it really all be related to that time period I try my best not to remember? To that time where all I knew crumbled around me? To the time when I was crushed yet felt I had no where to turn to? To that time where I was in the lowest of lows unable to move up and just let everything around crumble without giving a care to anything?

From before that time, I know there were still times I may have slacked some, but I felt guilty somewhat and given the chance I'd give it another go. From that time on however, there was no guilt... just regrets. Oh! I wish I'd have continued! Why did I stop? *shrugs* Oh well.. maybe I'll take it up later or I'll go tomorrow... only tomorrow never comes and later becomes never.

I thought I had fixed things from that time.
Is it really fixed? How is something like that fixable? It's not something I want to get depressed about. Not something that'll take over my life and run it. No, for that is done. It's gone. I can't take back what I've lost. I can't continue on from then. But I can start anew. I can pick up what I've let drop and press on.

You can't change someone else. You can't even change yourself, unless the want is there. Then you can change. Small things, I've already changed. Medium things are next on my plate.. then will come the big ones ^_^

So, a list of things I want to pick up, take care of, make and do.

- get permit
- exercise daily
- clean house once a week
- laundry once a week
- make own meals
- dust/sweep
- learn Japanese
- work on voice acting
- learn flash programming
- lose weight/tone up
- learn Korean
- renew passport
- pay bills on time
- refund the brick
- save for Cali
- talk to Chris about Cali/summer
- go to Matane
- buy mic/stand
- buy desktop
- finish penguin

Now, of these things.. maybe not so much the order of importance as they're all important in their own ways but more in the order of things that need to be done sooner rather than later..

- get permit
- work on voice acting
- exercise daily
- lose weight/tone up
- renew passport
- save for Cali

- buy mic/stand
- buy desktop

- clean house once a week
- laundry once a week
- make own meals
- dust/sweep

- learn flash programming
- learn Japanese
- learn Korean

- pay bills on time
- refund the brick

- talk to Chris about Cali/summer
- go to Matane
- finish penguin


so there it be..
in what concerns exercising daily... it is to be in the early mornings
I'll be trying to keep tabs on myself in regards to what I eat and the exercise I do.

I'll write more soon but I'll be going now.. sooo tired!

Forever tonight

Here I am, sitting at my lappy just mosey-ing around listening to music. And it hits me "my moosic's crap!" lol well, not really, but I wanted something to sing along with, something even in French! Wow! it's been long since I've wanted to listen to a French song.. I have 1 currently on my lappy, but I wanted something else. So off I go to rummage through what I have. I didn't find the bulk of my cds but I did find the Marie Mai - Inoxydable cd. So, I was like "oh cool!" 'cuz my fav song "Encore une Nuit" is on it. (translation: One more night).
As I'm sitting here now, listening to it and singing along.. I start to tear up a bit, and y'know I kinda realize for the 1st time that I might like this song because I can relate to it. And really, that's kind of sad... because of the lyrics, because I've lived through the same thing... and because, well, yeah.. it's a touchy subject at the moment...

So, for those of you who've never heard of Marie Mai and therefore have never heard this song.. here are the lyrics (in French.... I'll add the English translation below it).


Endors-toi, petite.
J'te jure, demain tout ira mieux, bien sur.
Oublies ces paroles, oublies ces geste qui t'ont tant fait souffrir.

Endors toi, ma belle.
Je sais, le provoquer c'est pas c'que tu voulais.
Je sais tu l'aimes, tu n'as pas fait exprès.

[Bridge]
Encore une nuit
Où tu es seule, accroupie dans ton lit.
Où tu as mal et tu n'as rien compris.
Ne t'en fais pas, je sais qu'il t'aime aussi.

[Chorus]
Pourquoi c'est toi qui fini toujours dans ses bras,
À supplier de pardonner des gestes que t'as jamais posés.
Je sais, un jour,
Tu lui pardonneras à ton tour,
D'avoir cru que c'était d'l'amour;
D'avoir volé l'enfance que t'as toujours désirée.

Assis tout seul dans le salon, ton père marmonne ses illusions.
Il se fait croire qu'il a raison, qu'il n'a pas vu les bleus sur ton front.

Pourtant il a si mal.
Pourquoi est-ce si normal
De tant vouloir t'aimer et sans cesse te faire pleurer ?

[Chorus]


Now the English translation:

Go to sleep, little one
I swear, tomorrow everything will go/be better, for sure.
Forget these words, forget these gestures that made you suffer so much.

go to sleep, my pretty.
I know, to provoke him is not what you wanted.
I know you love him, you didn't do it on purpose.

[Bridge]
One more night
Where you're alone, crouched in your bed.
Where you're in pain and didn't understand anything.
Don't worry about it, I know he loves you too.

[Chorus]
Why is it you who always ends up in his arms,
Begging for forgiveness for gestures you never made.
I know, one day, you'll forgive him in turn.
For believing it was love;
For stealing the childhood you always desired.

Sitting along in the livingroom, your dad mumbles his illusions.
Making himself believe that he's right, that he didn't see the bruises on your forehead.

Yet he's in so much pain,
Why is it so normal
To want to love you so much and without cease, making you cry?

[Chorus]

dansons la capucine, y'a pas de pain chez nous...

So here I am... tired, but recently frozen so I'm no longer falling asleep. Had problems stay asleep last night. This time it wasn't caused by my cutie (kitty) who usually likes to wake me up at night so she can get extra attention... I'm awaiting an email, kinda really hoping it's coming.. so much so I was dreaming about it.. I don't think I've ever anticipated receiving a msg this much. In my dream, I was weirdly surrounded by the guys from Wong Fu Productions... they were like sidekicks/support.. I think I spent too much time on youtoob watching their skits yesterday that they followed me into my dream lol and in my dream I was eagerly awaiting that email.. and it was so vivid that when I received it, the guys had to remind me I was dreaming and it hadn't really been sent... and then, a little time would pass and then they'd all chime in that I had received the long awaited msg... and here I'd wake up and realise it was all a dream.. I must've woken up at least 4 times during the night. Never being able to fall straight back to sleep. oy vay! The last time I woke up it was 5am, positive that I had received said msg. I tossed and turned, not capable of falling back asleep and when I couldn't take it anymore at 5:30am I finally got up to check my inbox... stoopid dream, I didn't get the msg... *sigh* and I still haven't... I'm falling off the edge of my seat waiting for it. geez...
But I've decided (something that didn't cross my mind last night), if this happens again tonight, I'm getting up, making myself a cup of coffee and then going back to bed. Coffee puts me out like a light, the stronger the better.. I only have instant so it can't be super strong, but it'll do, I'm sure!

On another note, I've been sending a lot of emails and scanning things these past 2 days. This is also what caused me to freeze a little while ago and wake me up some (I had been nodding off prior to scanning my mom's last "order", now I'm almost wide awake... with burning eyes).

As I tend to get side-tracked whenever doing just about anything lol I also scanned in a pic, totally non-related to the things I was supposed to scan for my mom :P it's mini me! lol my mom found a (very rare) pic of a little me lying around... so I scanned it in too! Without further ado, here be a 7 yr old lettuce bug ^-^

But yeah, preparations being made for my mom to buy my condo.. 'cause the notary ought to be calling me soon so I can go purchase a new condo.. I'll have to call him soon if he doesn't call me by the end of this week as the bank is going to start taking payments as of Feb. 22nd.
I'm sooo looking forward to moving!!! I've fallen in love with the new condo, it's so pretty and it's LEED-certified. It's a 4 1/2 and I have a walk-in closet!! woot! I'm turning it into a recording studio for my voice acting ^_^ *beams*

Awersome coolest as hell news!! Sonata Arctica is coming back here in April, I found out 2 days ago. I'm totally stoked!!! Already bought my ticket! Total awersomeness!!! They're my all-time favourite band! I'm sooo happy they're back, and so soon too.. they were just here last October *nods* but I'm happy they're back.

Well, there are my ramblings for today. Hopefully I'll be able to sleep tonight, *crossing fingers* also hoping I get my long awaited msg tonight or in the VERY near future... the anticipation is starting to drive me bonkers!!


Nite all! *waves*

oh the weather outside is FRIGHTFUL!!

So it's been a while since my last entry. I can't say I've been up to much. Took a little break from everything as I took on my very first crochet project.... making a penguin pillow for my best friend, it's still in the making 'cuz i got frustrated on the feet and kinda just put it aside. I'll probably pick it back up this weekend.

What did I do during all that inactive crochet time you ask? Well, I submerged myself in Korean dramas.. what bliss! It helped that I had a little more than 1 full week off from work, I got all that much more viewing in ^_^

Here are some on the movies & series I watched, as well as my take on them...

starting with movies:

A Wolf's Temptation - (fun, action, saaad but good)

He Was Cool - (aka The Guy was Cool - cute, funny, kinda corny)

Innocent Steps - (cute, dance, w Moon Geun-yeong)

Jenny, Juno - (cute, similar to "Juno" but they keep the baby)

Marrying the Mafia - Movie (comedy, cute)

My Boss, My Hero - (strange, stupid, w action)

My Sassy Girl - (awersome, cute & funny, little sad; romantic comedy)

My Tutor Friend - (funny, cute)

Please Teach Me English (very cute, funny, romantic comedy, me like ^_^)

S Diary (cute, funny, me gots mixed feeling ending)

She's on Duty (action, comedy not too funny but cute w Gong Yoo)

The Classic - (lovely heartwarming, soooo sad, happy ending yet soo sad) ** fav

Windstruck - (soo sad, but hehe ending, must watch after My Sassy Girl to get ending lol)

100 Days With Mr Arrogant - (cute, very funny)


and the series I watched:

Sweet 18 (cute, funny, tearjerker)

The Painter of the Wind (heartwrenching, tearjerking beautiful movie, sad end) **fav


so, umm, yeah I guess I've been kinda busy lol being the new form of couch potato, instead of watching tv I watch kdramas on ze interwebs ^_^ but really... what else can I do when it's FREEZING outside!!

I've also recently (as of the new year) started to do some exercises.
Really, I should've never stopped.. had to do physio a few years back 'cuz I had injured my back when I fell on the snow & ice covered sidewalks (stupid mayor couldn't be bothered to put sand on streets & sidewalks).. not fun, also one of the reasons I now hate going outdoors when there's snow.
So, yeah, they had given me exercises to do and told me to continue even after my physio was over because if I gain weight I'll always have back pains grrrr and these exercises help to strengthen my back muscles and kinda firm me tummy up...
I slacked, then I altogether stopped.. I've since gained some weight back and recently my back started hurting again. *exasperated sigh* So there you have it, my reason for starting up my exercises again.. I know I have to start walking more as well, but with there being snow out there I'm not partial to the idea of doing that and I don't have the money to go to a gym... unless anyone knows of a workout gym that's free? Anyone? Oh! and it'd have to be in the Montreal area.