Sunday, May 15, 2011

fun day, horrible night..

Still a little plague rat, though no longer contagious. I went out Saturday with my lil' Drago to what was supposed to be a "quick" trip to the SPCA and then to Walmarde to pick up some much needed kitty supplies. Quick trips to the SPCA have never been short in my lifetime and that didn't change saturday either >.< We stayed until 5pm but it was extremely fun and Raine has become a daddy for the 1st time!! He got a cute little kitty, almost all black with a few white spots. She's tooo cute ♥ and we will go pick her up either Monday or Tuesday. We both left very happy.. I think happy is an understatement... Raine was extatic X3 hehe
So, today we set out to get kitty supplies. This is his first kitty so we got a litter box and ear wipes and toys and food. We'll be picking up the litter on Monday, same as the pet carrier. It was really fun, I always have fun with Raine ^^ I'll be going with him to pick up Mia (he's named her that =3) and then we'll take her home and play.. and then I'll have to go work Dx beurk... working on a Monday night.. how atrocious D8

So, home later today and well.. I spoke to my bf.. if you could even call it that.. he's been dodgy for 2 weeks now. Moreso, since our spat last Tuesday when I was feverish and asked him to do something for me and well.. it kind of exploded.. he hadn't really been talking much to me all week. If he'd log on to msn, he'd barely speak to me. He said we needed to talk but he would wait for me to get better. I was leaving the issue alone.. although it hurt me, I knew if he wanted to talk to me maybe I was looking into things too much. I wasn't. The way he briefly "spoke" to me on msn tonight was all too obvious. But we wouldn't see each other until next Saturday? So, I pushed and asked regardless and he called me.. and tells me he still loves me but doesn't know what to do anymore because I shattered his heart when I said I couldn't rely on him. He says he knows I didn't mean it, but it hurt and so much so that he doesn't know what to do anymore. So, friends we'll remain and maybe with time he'll get over it and want to work things out. Just like maybe in time, he might not and it'll end at that. Do I want to break up? No, I don't. He says he doesn't want to either and still loves me.. but is breaking up with me anyways. Why is love so fickle?
I think I feel better knowing that it's over rather than having to fret for another week not knowing, doubting and that would probably be more heart-renching in the long run.. Still, I hurt now, and can't help but cry. 

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